Old Path White Clouds (OPWC): Chapter 1

(**taking it even more slowly; more chapters coming!)

– December 15, 2025, ~4:39 pm to 5:10 pm. 

The first frame: OPWC feels like comparative biomythography. As spiritual as it is literary and scholarly, the text hybridizes genre and speaks in a polyphonic, plurivocal register. Although it reads as deceptively simple—almost like short parables, or moral lessons—the text starts to shimmer the longer you take to receive it, and a deeper or more expansive layer of meaning opens up. I say “comparative” because this describes, in large part, its scholarly aim, “to present the life and teachings of Gautama Buddha,” and its comparative method, biography, history, and myth  “drawn directly from 24 Pali, Sanskrit, and Chinese sources… tracing the Buddha’s life slowly and gently over the course of 80 years, partly through the eyes of Svasti, the buffalo boy, and partly through the eyes of the Buddha himself.” So we get another access code to OPWC right here, from the blurb on the back cover: a heterogeneity of perspectives, all framed as partial, is embedded in the very structure and temporal unfolding of the book. In the final sentence, we are reminded that this book should also be considered “religious literature”-- delicious. That gives me (and anyone joining me) full license to apply my literary and rhetorical training to engage with this text, to analyze it, to respond not just as a spiritual penitent but as a full-scale critical thinker making sense of some truly unfathomable and catastrophic shit, to put it plainly. Here we go! 

Svasti, the buffalo boy: seems like the protagonist and main disciple whose spiritual trajectory we follow over the course of the book. He’s 20 in the first chapter, which is when he leaves his siblings behind to study with the Buddha, following what seems to be his clear calling, echoing back to at least a decade earlier, when he met Prince Siddhartha right before he reached Enlightenment (forgive if I’m butchering this!) and became the Buddha/Gautama. 

We follow Svasti’s goodbye to his siblings, which of course is eerily resonant with my final goodbye with Drew, which I won’t get into here but will certainly process at some point. The overwhelming sense is that Svasti leaves to follow the path of the Buddha, to walk with the Buddha and to study with him, not voluntarily so much as inevitably. There seems like something ordained, foretold, required about his path, about his departure, that young as they are, even his siblings understand and accept through their grief. So Svasti heads out with Gautama/the Buddha, and the Buddha’s son, Rahula, along with other high-ranking monks, some of whom are related to the Buddha. 

Here we get the establishing frame, maxim, and layered teaching of “walking just to walk.” We could unpack for hours what the “just” is doing here, and I’ll leave a Derridean tab open on justice, and what the just is… maybe I can circle back later. The key quote is this: 

It seemed to Svasti that the Buddha walked just to enjoy the walking, unconcerned about arriving anywhere at all. So it was with all the bhikkhus. No one seemed anxious or impatient to reach their destination. Each man’s steps were slow, balanced, and peaceful… They walked with quiet dignity, observing each breath and each step (Hanh 9). 

Ah! Now I understand why Drew told me not to worry so much about getting this dream job. Writing just to write, studying just to study, reading just to read, not about reaching a destination, or some symbolic accolade, credential, or status symbol. That makes sense. Now, how to let go of the ego enough to actually integrate that into my daily thought processes and reorient my behaviors and life goals around such an ego-annihilating insight? Vastly harder. But, as with all things Drew, slow, steady, and consistent, even if halting, steps each day can make a difference. So what does that look like? Hmm… not quite a half-measure, too much of a cop-out; something of a challenge but not too ambitious so I don’t get discouraged. I still care about this job and will inevitably spend some amount of time secretly yearning and thrilling over it, but I will try to consciously loosen my attachment to the outcome and try to enjoy the process as a learning experience. We’ll see how that goes, I’ll keep you posted. 

I’m also making a mental note to take more walks, literal as that is. Pure, immersive presence, is what’s coming to mind as I take in this passage. Quiet dignity, of course, is Drew’s spiritual essence crystallized in two words. Breathing is absolutely something actionable that I can and should work on. It’s such a simple yet reliable, effective nervous system regulator– specifically, the parasympathetic nervous system, which gets super activated during trauma responses, when the amygdala lights up and so forth. Deep, measured, intentional breathing. It also has a more metaphorical ring to it: breathing life into, animating, grounding, presencing as a key part of mindful living (and, perhaps, dying, we’ll get to that eventually). 

Chapters 2-5 forthcoming! I’m experimenting with posts of different length, and this felt like a self-contained response to the first chapter that I was ready to put out in the world. I’ll keep working through this and post more chapter responses as soon as they’re ready.